Stan’s Soapbox – Marvel Age #54 (September 1987)

Imagine that! Practically this entire issue of MARVEL AGE MAGAZINE is devoted to Spidey’s wedding! And when I got married, it didn’t even make the local fanzines! Of course, when I got married there weren’t any fanzines – people were still carving their messages on the walls of caves!

Anyway, if I may digress for a moment (I may? oh, you wonderful, generous human being!), you’re probably wondering what that odd-looking strip at the bottom of this page is all about. Well, wonder no more, O True Believer! Herewith is the authentic scuttlebutt…

Good ol’ Slim-Jim Salicrup, the exemplary editor of this most erudite mag, found some old comic strips that had been filed away and forgotten years ago in the musty recesses of ye batty bullpen. One of those comic strips was a minor masterpiece from the dim past which had appeared in in the newspapers for a number of years, drawn by Dazzlin’ Dan DeCarlo and scripted by my own lovable self. Now here’s the part that’ll getcha where you live! Notice the name on the strip? Sound familiar? Well, now you know from whence I got the name of the Fantastic Four’s magniloquent mailman! Hey, one guy I don’t mind stealing from in me!

Speaking of Willie Lumpkin, I wonder how many of you know where the name Irving Forbush came from? No, it wasn’t written in blazing letters across the sky; I actually dreamed it up. But when and where was it first used? Okay, scholars, take pen in hand – here’s another chance for a non-tarnishable No-Prize!

Next, before we get on to the heavy stuff, I just wanna mention that this column’s mail has been getting heavier each day. Much as I’d like to answer each and every letter (because it’s easier than working), there’s just no way. It’s all I can do to get the time to read ‘em. So don’t be disappointed if you don’t receive one of my suitable-for-framing answers to your own billet doux. In fact, count your blessings – my letters usually arrive “postage due”!

Now back to Spidey’s wedding. No! I won’t be a male chauvinist! I’ll rephrase that! Now back to Mary Jane Watson’s wedding! There, that outta score me some points with the ladies! Anyway, there’s nothing I can say about the happy couple’s nuptials that hasn’t already been said in the world’s press, so here’s a little trivia quiz for you old-time Marvel madmen. Can you remember another wedding, years ago, in which Jolly Jack Kirby drew himself and me crashing the union of two of our favorite characters? Remember the title of the mag? The issue number? Remember how Jack and I were drawn? Well, if you’re expecting another No-Prize contest, forget it! All I’m wondering is, did the drawing do me justice?!!

Uh oh, before I go I promised a few dozen Spideyphilies I’d mention a major problem they’ve been having. Seems they’ve been searching for the big Ballantine book THE BEST OF SPIDER-MAN and found that it was sold-out in their bookstores. Well, we don’t want any disappointed web-heads running around loose, so if your book store is out of stock, I suggest you write to Ms. Ann LeFarge, Editor, Ballantine Books, 201 E. 50th St., NYC, NY 10022. If there are any copies left on Earth, Adorable Ann may be able to help you get ‘em.

And that wraps it up for now. But don’t get all teary-eyed about it. If Dr. Doom’s new jogging outfit doesn’t rust up on him before he can conquer the world, I’ll be back at the same old stand next wish to amaze and astound you with still another capricious column of startling unimportance!

Excelsior!

–Stan